The Art of Ending

"Great is the art of beginning. Greater still is the art of ending."

Saying good-byes are weird, especially after a relatively routine activity; say one that's been consistent for 2.5 years. I had my last D&D game last night with the gang, and after Todd dropped me off, I almost just got out of the car and walked into my apartment with the usual "see you guys next week". It was also strange closing off the game itself (with regards to me as a player). Like closing the curtain after a 2.5 year stage play.

Good-byes can be so anti-climactic. It always feels like there is more to say than there actually is, or that some event that shatters the mundane is required in order to legitimize the leave-taking. This makes me glad that there will be a more social, fun and different venue for saying good-bye to all my friends. I'm really looking forward to that night on the 7th. Also, I shouldn't be as stressed by that time as I am right now. Too much is happening, and it's snuck up on me. "Hurry up and wait" has been the order of the day for the past 6 weeks, and now it's simply "hurry up".

On that note, I'm off to get some ingredients for Thai Coconut Chicken soup, and grab some boxes from the Beer Store. Of course I'll make a donation as well... and they'll give me beer as a thank-you for the donation.

All Is Going According to My Evil Plan

Went in for my consultation for wavefront PRK surgery this morning, and I'm approved and highly eligible (how often do I hear that?). Surgery date is the 21st, but I need to go in this Friday to have a 30-minute map of my eye done. I called for a dentist appointment today, and someone had just canceled so I'm going in tomorrow morning at 8:30.

Now I just need to get my travel vaccines done (yay for OHIP coverage) and try to find the number for the specialist I'm supposed to see so I can reschedule that, and I'm rockin'. Hooray for things working out regardless of not having had a plan in place!

Eye Surgery

Woohoo! I'm going in tomorrow morning (Tuesday) for a consultation, and if all is well at that time, I'll be having Wave-front PRK surgery on the 21st of June, with approx 3 days recovery time. It will be with Dr. Edmison, the director of Focus Eye Centre.

Yay! One step out of the way. Now to check on times when I can get my travel vaccines and schedule a dentist appointment.

The only issue is this may infringe on Angie's visit. I hope it won't, or that I'm not half-blind. I'll need to check with her to confirm when she's coming up. If it's on the 23rd, then all should be well.

I'm excited about this. Apparently, vision correction between -1.00 and -6.00 is considered low correction, and has the highest improvement rates. I'm at -5.25 and -5.75.

China, Here I Come

That's the news. I'm off to China asap, which for me is the 1st or 2nd of July. Booya. I'll be staying a day in Beijing, then traveling to Shijiazhuang, where I'll stay while I use their office to find a contract directly with a school. The agency is called New Times.

Lots to do between now and then: get my travel vaccines for that region, get wave-front PRK surgery, go to a dentist, pack, skip around the neighbourhood with glee, etc.

WEEEE!

I actually had to turn down a job offer in Japan because they wanted me to be able to get over there within 2 weeks. I had to politely decline. At the same time, the offer from China came through. I just need to check out references, some of which they provide up front, and I may ask for others or simply fire questions their way. Linda's been awesome, being in China right now teaching, so I've been bugging her unmercifully for information on cost of living and other things.

Suffice it to say, I'm excited. That's all for now.

EDIT: errr... not 1st or 2nd of July, but likely 15th - 20th timeframe.

Not asking for much

... just a little good news.

The application and submission process for overseas teaching opportunities has been depressing, to say the least. I would have been good to go for two positions in Japan, however... one required that I already be in Japan for a face-to-face interview, and the other required that I at least be able to have an interview in Vancouver. The opportunity in the Czech Republic? Need an EU passport. Other opportunities? Either in Tokyo or requiring a year's+ experience.

I've heard that it is possible to obtain an EU passport if one has a family member within 2 generations (or is it 3?) that was born in an EU country. My grandfather qualifies, having been born in Poland before coming to Canada in 1921 or something. Poland joined the EU in May 2004. I will find out more about that process and qualifications this afternoon, I hope.

So yeah. It's a bit disheartening, but I'm keeping at it despite the constant set-backs and lack of responses.

Strings

I found this movie by complete happenstance, at the convenience store around the corner from my place.

It was pretty damn good. Dark Crystal good. The lighting was absolutely fucking brilliant. The entire film was done with marionettes that know that they're marionettes; that's the whole basis of the movie, or rather the thing that 'ties' it all together. (har har - but no, seriously) Kind of a morbid Lion King storyline, with some really desolate and depressing scenes. It was really well done, both the puppeteering and the story itself:

King kills himself, leaves his kingdom to his son with a very Gladiator-style hope (peace), evil brother corrupts it and spawns war by saying the king was assassinated by the rival nation, then a long character-building process of discovery for the disposed heir. That sounds cliche and "meh", but it was quite well done.

I'm so glad that arts like these haven't been lost, despite the fact the movie could have been done using pixar 3-D animation, without marionettes. I often worry if we've entered an age where "art for art's sake" no longer holds true. Movies like "Strings" give me hope. Then I think of 90% of the other movies out there and I get frustrated with the world's lack of vision and authenticity.

(For some odd reason, two of the only pictures I could find of the movie had Ghrak, a henchman, in it. He was a cool character, but c'mon.)

Movies to look forward to

- 12 and Holding (looks exceptional)
- Peaceful Warrior (Nick Nolte as a non-psychopath? Giddy-up. I also secretly like inspiring stories.)
- A Scanner Darkly (Philip K. Dick ftw!)
- District B13 (sorry, story by Luc Beson and from the guy who did Ong Bak and Transporter 2... it'll be one helluvan action movie)
- Monster House (great voice cast, and looks like a great movie)
- Caché (French film; seems like a good thriller)
- Three Times (a very interesting Chinese independent)
- Ghost Rider (just for pure enjoyment factor)

And I can't believe a "How to Eat Fried Worms" movie is being made. I loved the book. Read it back when I was 9 or 10. I would also like to see 2046. I keep seeing it in movie stores, but haven't gotten it. Nor have I checked out Audition, which Jay says is a good Miike film.

A really interesting trailer I just saw: Drawing Retraint 9. It's described as follows: The core idea of Drawing Restraint 9 is the relationship between self-imposed resistance and creativity, a theme it symbolically tracks through the construction and transformation of a vast sculpture of liquid Vaseline, called “The Field”, which is molded, poured, bisected and reformed on the deck of the ship over the course of the film.

Bjork stars in it, so it looked to have a Dancer In the Dark feel, but far more artistic and over-the-edge.

It just sucks that most theatres in Ottawa don't show the really neat movies.

300...

A while back I had made mention of a movie coming out called "300" based on the Battle of Thermopylae. This movie is instead based on the graphic novel(s) by Frank Miller (Sin City). The movie looks like total ass. Fuck I hate Hollywood. Why the fuck are they basing a movie on a graphic novel when the fucking event itself can be easily referred to, there being plenty of historical background and depth?!

Simple logic:

Event --> Movie (1 step)
Event --> Graphic Novel --> Movie (2 steps)

Does no one else see how this makes zero fucking sense? It's like quoting someone who is paraphrasing the actual individual whose quote you desire. Plato is rolling in his grave right now.

Based on the video journals, even the costumes are fucked. Seems like all they got right were the crimson cloaks, though I didn't see any lambdas (the symbol of the Spartan city-state) on any of those cloaks, so I guess they didn't get that right either. Their swords look like shite, and their helmets are all pock-marked and scarred, completely unlike the disciplined state the Spartans kept their kit in. Their shields bear no devices, and THEY'RE NOT WEARING ANY FUCKING ARMOUR! In the footage, they aren't even fighting in phalanyx formation.

AND THERE WERE MORE THAN 300 on the Greeks' side! There were 300 Spartans... with about 7,000 allies. Plus their squires, blacksmiths/weaponsmiths/armoursmiths, cooks, and of course the rabble that follows any army: merchants, scavengers and the like.

FUCK. I hate people.

Mladá Boleslav, Czech Republic

Okay, so it's not exactly Japan. However, the opportunity presented seems to be a good one. I sent my letter of intro expressing my interest, along with my resume and a recent photo.

I think if they accept me, and the terms are good, I will make a go of it. It's a town of 50,000 located 50 kms NE of Prague. I got a good feeling from the narrative of the listing, but we shall see.

Beggars can't be choosers, and right now... I am a bedlam beggar.

Old Boy

So I was in Toronto this past weekend, and I have to say that one of the highlights was getting together with Jay and watching movies. His pick was Old Boy, and mine was Seven Samurai. Combine that with a Thai stirfry (freakin' awesome, Jay!), a tonne of beer, and it was one helluva night.

Old Boy is a very difficult movie to describe. It feels like a Korean Fight Club/Memento/Titus Andronicus type of film, but that doesn't do the emotional extravagance or volitility justice. It's a movie without conventional boundaries, one that encroaches on the morally horrific.

To say it's well-filmed is as underwhelming as saying the Holocaust was a bad time. I'd have to watch it again to pay special attention to the filming, but it worked perfectly for what was being accomplished. It was dark, moody, always edgy, bordering on nervous. The scene that starts with a frightened Daesu-Oh watching an ant crawl out of his arm will live in my mind as one of the most... mind-stinging scenes I've ever seen.

I think what really stood out about this movie was the portrayal of emotion, and that emotion's discharge. I wish we could have watched it sans subtitles; so many nuances and subtleties of emotion get lost in translation. Imagine Shakespeare translated into contemporary Swahili. It just wouldn't work.

I'm not sure what else I can really say without divulging the plot, which really needs to be witnessed a priori. It was a great movie, and I'm also glad I could share Seven Samurai with Jay.

Overall, it was an awesome weekend in Toronto - I had a blast catching up and talking with Michelle, and hanging out with Jason. It was a much-needed getaway. I'm not sure what I was getting away from, though. I guess a certain stagnation, or ennui. It was a great chance to refocus.

Damn geography

That position I spoke about in "Belay that last" post below has gone all the way to the interview stages... however, the director of the school wishes to meet with me in person. She said "It is difficult otherwise", meaning that it would be very unlikely for me to proceed beyond the stage I'm at.

That blows. 570-some people had applied by the time I had, and I was one of a handful contacted for an interview phase of the application. I'm starting to honestly wonder if I might not be better off getting over there and annoying the hell out of Adrian and Fiona for a bit while I look and make myself available in-person. I know for a fact I kick ass in interviews - nothing freaks me out thanks to my final Infantry Officer interview: one Lt Col., one Maj., two Capt's... glass door looking in on the other three there for the same interview. I've been a whiz since then. I don't get nervous and I present myself well.

Very difficult to do that from half a world away. I think it's time for that A/V "letter of introduction".

I guess I'll see what the response is from the director. I basically replied saying that I would not be in country for an interview, and pushed a bit to see if she would accept a Skype interview. I'm thinking no, but hey... shows my genuine interest and it's a reasonable alternative that will cost them nothing.

As I always say... We shall see. Lots of other things out there I'm going to focus on so as not to get my hopes up.

The world is a neat place

Saw this video posted on a forum, and thought it was pretty amazing. I'd heard of hydrogen fuel before, obviously, but seeing it in action is pretty astounding. Hope this guy does well! We could all use a new, clean fuel source.

Belay that last

Hmmm... okay, so I was contacted this morning for an interview. It seems like a neat opportunity: 28 working hours including 25 teaching hours. I'm not sure what the "working hours" means - it might mean 3 hours alloted for prep and grading. It's based out of Nagoya, but I will need to take a train to Gifu and Ogaki also (each apparently only 30 mins from Nagoya). I guess I'll see what the director says about the fact I'm not currently in Japan. From his email to me, I couldn't tell if that was a pre-requisite or simply a preference.

The job is teaching to both kids and adults. This is the public job posting:

Classes in both Ogaki, Gifu and Nagoya, Aichi (both places 30 minutes by train from Nagoya station)

Seeking native full time EFL teacher, to teach students ranging from children - adult. Applicant must have experience with small children, be fun loving, energetic and creative. We are seeking applicants with dedication, drive and initiative. Our children's lessons are based on PLS method which is high standard as well as effective instruction and we also use a lot of games songs and dance to enhance English language acquisition. Musical talent is not essential, but a good sense of humor is! The position is 28 working hours including 25 teaching hours per week.

Monthly Salary is 280,000 - 300,000 yen per month. There will be transportation fee provided on top of the monthly salary. The position starts Mid of June or end of August. It is a twelve month renewable contract. All native speaking applicants who have completed 4 year university degree at minimum are welcome to apply.
Please send your resume with your current photo.

So ummm... ignore my angry rant below. Patience is a virtue that likes to give me the cold shoulder. *innocent whistling*

Me out.

Frustration

I applied for a teaching position near Shikoku island this morning, and since I applied via the website the job was listed on, I received an email. Actually, I wish I hadn't, though it was smart of them to set up the system like they did. The contents of that email is as follows:

This email is to confirm that your resume has been sent to *name of school* for Job ID #*****. To date, 52 resume(s) have been submitted through *name of website* for this position. Please note that many companies only contact candidates they are interested in.

Fucking christ. How does one have a fucking chance in hell when 52 people (today alone) have applied to a position in some small village where the largest urban centre is one of 440,000 people, an island away? What chance do I have to get anything that seems a better location? What I'm saying is that this wasn't exactly the opportunity of a lifetime, and it received 52 applicants. It was a chance, a shot in the dark. I feel like I have a fucking flintlock pistol and everyone else has a .50 cal.

I'm just fucking pissed. I take a firm stance finally in my insignificant life, and I feel blocked in at every turn. Maybe I should haul ass to Japan prior to having a contract and hit the street, door to door, Willy Lowman style.

Fuck.

Some games should come with a Surgeon General warning

This game, for instance. Doom 3. The label should read: Please use the bathroom each time before playing this game, and if you have a heart condition, please don't even pick up this box.

I got it the day it came out two years ago, but didn't play it too much. However, in this recent period of career inertia, I took it up again looking to get away from MMOs (massively multiplayer online [games]).

So I jumped back into Doom 3. ... and just about soiled myself, but only after numerous close-call heart-failures. I kid thee not, this game can kill people of weak constitution. For a time, I could only play for 2-5 minute spurts. I'd simply get too freaked out. To combat this, I stopped playing at night, with all the lights out. Now I can play for a good 20-30 minutes before I feel like my chest is going to explode - which would be poetically just given that I inflict such inconvenience on pudgy, no-jaw'd, Hell-infused walking corpses in the game.

Plot Summary: 2045 (or something), humans have colonized Mars, and have an advanced research facility there. They've also uncovered the remains of a martian civilization, and likewise uncovered some of the technology. There's some faster-than-light transportation technology that is being messed around with. You play some Everyman marine just posted there as security. Not surprisingly, the instant you arrive, there's a job for you: find a missing scientist. As you move around, you hear rumours of people going AWOL, psychiatric reviews becoming more frequent, and there's a sense of general unease. Well, you find the scientist, who is trying to send a message back to Earth. Then... all Hell literally breaks loose. You've got a flashlight (weee) and a pistol. ... and those nice scientists, marines, admins, and technicians you spoke to on the way down? They're either lying in three pieces, being coughed from ventilation shafts, are grease smears on the walls/floors/ceilings, or have been possessed by demonic forces and are hunting you. In other words: it gets real freaky, real fast.

And visceral, as the image above can attest to (in-game shot, not doctored up or from a cinematic). Zombies on fire, zombies who stand up when you walk past, zombies eating other zombies, 28 Days Later style zombies in commando uniforms with weapons... and the worst part: the legions of Hell in all their mangled and grisly splendor. Zombies? No problemo. Mutated spiders that are two feet tall and look like face-huggers (ref. Aliens); two-headed, blood-drooling quadropeds that look like skinned, decaying muscle-men; skeletal juggernauts with rocket-launchers on their shoulders and smoldering eye-sockets; and huge pink fleshed rhinos with robotic hind-quarters... Those get to me.

Mostly the freak-out factor comes from the stunning graphics, and use of dynamic lighting (and frequent uses of zero lighting). As per usual, id Software broke the envelope when they developed the Doom 3 graphics engine. I still haven't seen anything that compares to it.

So why did I choose to ramble on about a silly FPS (first-person shooter) game? Partly because it's a game that deserves acknowledgement, but primarily because I can't help but remember Super Mario Bros on NES in '86, and thinking how cool that was. Or the original Doom, or Wolfenstein (first FPS). Those games were amazing back in the day, but weren't scary. They simply couldn't stimulate those sorts of intense emotions due to the state of the medium. What amazes me is that we're already to the point of evoking cathartic or intense reactions through simulated means. More and more control is relinquished to the player, allowing deeper immersion and thus also a stronger emotional response to content. Detail is also critically important. It's not enough that I, as a player, find myself in a bathroom with a flickering overhead light. Tiles are loose, a sink broken and running, the mirror actually reflects everything in the room (character included), a stall door is slightly ajar and squeaking back and forth, 5-point surround sound delivers peripheral hisses and groans from areas out of line of sight.

There's just something addictive about fear. We crave it, when it can be controlled and we can walk away unscathed. Look at all the movies, books, games and amusement park rides dedicated to fear. I think it's because fear is the most fundamental of all human emotions, the one that is most closely linked to all our actions.

Wow... this was a long entry.

So - many - opportunities...

I applied/began the process of applying to 3 ESL schools this morning. Sheesh. There's so much out there, but I'm trying to stay away from Tokyo. All 3 were central Honshu, W/SW of Tokyo, in the Aichi (sp?) prefecture: Nagoya, Mito and Nakakoma-gun. The one in Nakakoma-gun looks fantastic, though I'm trying to be more cautious. The reason? The school I was looking at in Takamatsu, Shikoku, has had a few nasty things said about it. Summary of nastiness: the director is extremely racist, the teachers instill a strong bias against gaijin (foreigners) especially those who are Christian or Jewish, they refuse to pay the end-of-term bonus and try to force a continued contractual obligation by threatening to have false criminal charges laid against teachers. Etc etc.

Sounds like a charming place. That said, it could be highly exaggerated, but the fact that anyone would want to exaggerate a teaching experience is indicative of a poor environment. I'm progressing with the application process, and will be very very adamant re: having numerous references from current and former teachers. If they don't like it, I say "Thanks, but no thanks".

I've abandoned the silly, whimsical hope of being in Kansai region. I just want to be over there, and I care more about the school environment than I do about the regional environment. That said, I do not want to be in a large city, but from everything I've seen, that will not be too big an issue.

The one issue that seems to arise every now and again is the need for a driver's license, as a number of schools are based in X area, but teach in R, S, Y, Z locations. So those are out for me. It's unfortunate, because of some those pay more.

So that's my update... I'm just truckin' along, watching the ESL boards carefully and applying to just about everything I see that seems hopeful in terms of job responsibilities, benefits, location and school. What I really need is a recent picture of myself. I might just go and get something done today at Black's Photography or something.

Me out.

Just call me Random Vegetation Sanjuro

Yeah, so I'm currently obsessed with Kurosawa samurai movies. STOP JUDGING ME!

Today I watched both Yojimbo (the bodyguard) and Sanjuro, movies linked only by Mifune's character whose name is *random vegetation name* Sanjuro. "Going on 40". Sorry, you gotta watch both to get it. I think I enjoyed Yojimbo more for the plot and intrigue and "lone wolf" feel, and Sanjuro for the combat and dynamic between Mifune's character and the 9 sword-bungling youngsters whose asses he constantly pulls out of the fire. In Yojimbo, Sanjuro enters a random town and swaps his tentative services between two rival gang leaders, turning the town against itself to punish the evils that have taken root there. Sanjuro sees the same character coming to the aid (very randomly) of 9 fumbling but well-meaning swordsmen who are trying to free a chancellor who was framed by a colleague. Think Han Solo helping NINE dopey Luke Skywalkers... :-)

I'll shut up now. But before I do, I'm going to change my name to Oaktree Twenty-Seven, Going On Thirty. (I'm still chuckling)

"I can't kill a lot with one sword!"

... a quote from Kikuchiyo (foreground, right), responding to why he's stabbing half a dozen swords into an earthen mound. (note: must be a pre-edits shot because there are only 6 samurai, the original number, and Kambei still has his top-knot and they're standing in the villagers' barley field)

I'm completely enthralled with Seven Samurai. Released in black-and-white in 1954 by acclaimed director, Akira Kurosawa, it's an absolute marvel to watch. The story is engrossing; the cinematography is precise, each shot perfectly framed; the characters memorable and enjoyable. It's 3+ hours, but feels like days; it seems as though you're watching through the eyes of a villager as the story moves. And I do not mean that as a slight.

If you've read Stephen King's "Wolves of the Calla", the 5th book in the Dark Tower series, then you know the exact premise of this movie. No doubt King was inspired to retell it, in his own fashion: villagers, plagued by and completely in terror of bandits, decide to hire samurai (ronin, actually) to protect them. Pay for the samurai service? Three meals a day. Each is there for his own reasons, some drawn out and examined, others kept quiet.

I watched The Hidden Fortress (Akira Kurosawa's 'comedy') last evening, and it was also wonderfully told, and quite funny. That movie heavily influenced Lucas' decision to portray Star Wars: A New Hope from the droids' perspective, as the Hidden Fortress is related from the view of two over-the-top greedy pissant peasants. Another novel storyline: two peasants are recruited, their greed as their bond, to help a disguised princess and her samurai general move 200 pieces of gold through enemy territory. You can see the distinct influence many of the shots in the movie had on Lucas, as well as the way in which C3-P0 and R2-D2 relate to one another in an eternal cycle of futile blame and complaint. Hell, even a lot of the setting of Tunisia was reminescent of where many of the scenes from THF were shot.

I think I'm done blabbing about things for now. I'm sitting here writing this, Seven Samurai paused as the final battle for the village is about to take place. Time to see how it ends, and how many of those swords Kikuchiyo gets to employ. ;-)

--2:44pm--
Okay, finished watching it, and had to watch it again. Doing so with commentary; a great addition to the content as the man is remarking on both historical context, character portrayal, divergences from typical Japanese films, pointing out stylistic variants and cinematic 'conceits'. Fucking brilliant. So much going on in each frame, I'm now taking the time (and paying attention to the commentator's cues) to watch the periphery of the frames. Incredible how much is happening all the time, all planned and put there by Kurosawa.

Welcome, O' Wondrous Deluge...

So it's only been... well, 16 hours since I posted my resume, and already I've gotten one personalized solicitation and two 'farmed' solicitations to teach overseas. Funny... they're all in South Korea, even though my subject line of my posting said 'Kansai, Japan'. Oh well. It's definitely nice to see offers coming in so quickly, and the page counter on the little resume site is moving, which is nice.

Time to reach out and see what the other TESOL grads in Japan have to say.

Can't think of a clever subject line

Well, I finally posted on one of the most prominent ESL boards. It was a good post, and as part of it I put in this link. I don't consider myself overly clever by any stretch of the imagination, but I thought it wise to make my 'international resume' and letter of introduction easy to reference online.

I'm waiting on the list of TESOL people over in Japan so I can start some networking and direct inquiries. I have a listing of schools in Japan, two of which seemed particularly promising, one in Nara and the other in Nagoya. Nara City is where'd I'd love to be, but I've broadened the scope of what I will accept in terms of geographical locations. I'm still adamant about being in the Kansai region, though.

Anyhoo... small update, but it feels significant given the number of recruiters and directors/principals who use the ESL forums to find prospective teachers for their schools.

Books to movies

It seems that Hollywood has recently become either brilliant or plain fucking lazy. The adaptations of books and old movies is a wise one, given our culture's predilection for consuming re-packaged items. Though a good number movies out there are brand-new (superficially, anyways), we're in an era of film nostalgia, or coupling the written with the audio-visual. Hell, they're even making video games into movies! Reference: Doom, Hitman (maybe), Tomb Raider, Final Fantasy. What next? Is there anything left for them to adapt to movies?

They re-made Texas Chainsaw Massacre, re-made Amityville Horror (blegh), Poseidon [Adventure], The Fog, etc etc. These tend to suck.

On the other side of the re-packaging coin are adaptations: Fight Club, Blade Runner (and a dozen other Philip K. Dick stories), From the Mouth of Madness, The Stand, Dune... The Da'Vinci Code.

I just recently bought the paperback of the Da'Vinci Code. I'm anti-excited (yeah, you heard me) to read it because of the hype that surrounded its original hardcover release, and now the Tom Hanks movie adaptation. I'm sure the movie will be good, but will the book be? With numerous other movies (at least sci-fi), I've read the books before being aware that a movie was in the works. A Scanner Darkly, for example. I read that back in 2nd year when I was in my ravenous Philip K. Dick frenzy. (he's the guy who wrote Paycheck, Total Recall, Imposter, Blade Runner, and Minority Report) The motion-capture animation film promises to kick ass.

So to get back to the point, I'm not sure if I should bother reading the Da'Vinci Code. I know I will read it, but should I? I can already sense myself being underwhelmed.

On a meta-existential level... I have such a tough life filled with gruelling decisions, huh? Back to reading.

Iron Kingdoms

Damn you, Steve (aka, Arreyder). I was in Fandom II today and remembered you giving kudos to Iron Kingdoms. ... so I bought the Character Guide. Only starting to read it now, but it seems like a nice campaign world for D&D 3.5.

In other news, it's been a productive week: finished off all the necessary paperwork from work, finished my TESOL specialization (Business English), got my income tax refund, got the money I was owed, and I've been quite social. Life is good.

FF VII: Advent Children

Wow. I mean holy mutha-fuckin' shit WOW. To think 20 years ago I thought a pixel that could bounce around and be controlled (Y, X axis only) was the height of technology and was "totally rad". I mean, christ, I played the first Final Fantasy for the original NES back in '87.

In case you have no freakin' clue what I'm vulgarly gushing about, Square Enix (Sony) just recently released a DVD movie based on Final Fantasy VII, the video game. It - is - insane; the very pinnacle of aesthetic delight. You know those really neat video game cinematics that segue or fill in story arcs? Okay, now picture a film where THE ENTIRE MOVIE IS THAT STYLE OF CG ANIMATION!!

I am buying this movie. Maybe two copies so I can watch one on my TV and one on my laptop.

Oh, and in other news I'm no longer working. Seriously. What do I think of this? I love it.

"Real men fondle Doomsday Devices"

If you're a Cthulhu fan (and c'mon... who's NOT?!), you have to read this. I always go back and read the survival guide every few months because it's so damn funny. That is I read it when I can freakin' find it.

If you've read most or a few of Lovecraft's short stories, you'll recognize many of the references. If you haven't read Lovecraft... well... ummm... you suck.

A passing

My Poppa (maternal grandfather) died in the hospital last night, one of his sons by his side.

Not sure exactly how I feel about it right now. It's sunk in, but my first thoughts were "are you okay, Mom?". The really really weird thing is that last night, at 10pm, I had the strangest need to watch Big Fish, regardless of the fact that doing so kept me up til midnight. This morning I woke up 50 minutes before I usually do, and that was when my mom called to tell me. I'm not saying it's prophetic, or what-have-you. It's just... I don't know.

I'm not sure what's happening now. I'm working from home (or trying to -- bloody VPN client). Pele definitely senses something. Though she's often a very affectionate cat, she's in comfort mode: quietly brushing up against my leg, hopping on my lap and rubbing her head against my chest.

I'm not grieving because Poppa is very much a part of me; I don't feel he's gone. Physically, sure. But of what true significance is that? There's no sudden emotional or memorial vaccuum as a result. He's still there, present in my life simply because he is. People don't go away, they don't disappear; they simply manifest in diverse ways at different times. I just can't think of it any differently, and I suppose Dr. Fox is to thank for that for pointing me towards Thich Nhat Hanh and his Buddhist teachings. Though I haven't been too emotional for other deaths in the family, though the last time someone died, I was only 13 or 14, which is not exactly an emotional apex.

All I know is that I have to be there for my mom and my nanna. The issue now is what does my nanna do? She really shouldn't stay in that house. I'm thinking she'll stay with my parents, as their new house (ready in 5 weeks) has a nanny sweet, as it were.

That's what gets me right now. The "now what happens" questions, the in-flux situation.

"It was the headphones..."

Normally I'm not one to [overtly] laugh at the misfortunes of others. But in this case, the unfortunate soul happens to be a friend and former co-worker, and his predicament is not your average-day whoopsie. In fact, had I not seen his email plus the journalist's editorial copy, plus the final story... I'd not believe it.

I almost died of shock and laughter, or shocked laughter, perhaps. Check this out:

While there were 10 fatalities throughout the Midwest (mostly in Missouri) no deaths were reported in Illinois. There was, however, one close call.

James Ford, an out-of-towner living in Springfield while on contract with the state agency, Central Management Systems (CMS), was in his 14th floor apartment when the storm began on Sunday evening.

When Ford noticed that the large window overlooking his balcony was bowing considerably from the pressure of the high winds, he opened the window and a tremendous vacuum created by the wind engulfed the room and pulled him outside. "It literally sucked me out of the apartment," he said.

Ford survived by grabbing the balcony railing pulling himself back into his apartment.

"The few seconds on that balcony was something else, let me tell you," Ford said.

This is the article itself.

Now, the story behind the story: James was wearing headphones and playing video games. He failed to hear/recognize the tornado sirens. Is that, or is that not, fucking insane? My vote: fucking insane for $500, Alex.

Only a few steps more

I sent my international resume and letter of introduction to the alumni coordinator at United TESOL. So that's basically finished. Just waiting on his feedback and some modifications to it, and then I'm ready to get out of Dodge. Now if only I could remember my password for the school's website so I could finish the last little bit of my specialization... bah.

Things are pretty quiet. I'm sitting in my grandparents' living room, siphoning internet from some silly n00b who decided he/she doesn't need to secure their wireless network. My Nan's asleep with a crossword puzzle in her lap, my Poppa half-watching muted CTV, slipping in and out of sleep. My mom's upstairs watching a movie with my cousin, no doubt they're both sleeping too. :)

My Poppa is doing better than I had thought he would be. He's on a slough of pills and everything else, but he doesn't seem any more the worse for wear than when last I saw him. My Nanna's cough has improved, and she seems better also. Who knows?

Tonight, supper at my aunt's with my mom's whole side of the family. Should be nice. It's been great to get away from Ottawa, even if that meant missing Michelle's trip through. (d'oh) But... heading to Toronto for the last weekend in April to see a few folks I haven't seen in years. Passing through North Bay, I met up with Marci, and met Christian and their baby Alex for the first time. It was awesome to see Marci again, and she is a great mother. Alex is quite well-behaved and a cutie of course.

That's about it on my end. Looking forward to a continued quiet weekend and a nice drive back to the ol' Ottawa. If I can remember my password, I'll finish all my TESOL work this weekend also.

Happy Easter, folks!

Digital degrees of separation

So I was just browsing a Dark Age of Camelot forum I usually troll, and saw a post responding to one of mine by someone who teaches in Japan. So... knowing him somewhat, I fired off a private message bombarding him with questions. It will be interesting to see what he has to say. From what he has alluded to previously, it seems he's very much enjoying it. However, I'm interested in what class groups he teaches, where he teaches, and if he teaches for a franchise or a private language school. That will make all the difference.

The intarweeb is a wonderful thing.

It will be mine... oh yes, it will be

That's right, a Jesus Is My Guild Leader shirt. It's geeking out in a very flash way.

I wants it!

(The joke about the shirt spawned from this Penny Arcade comic. Penny Arcade rules.)

Judas Iscariot - from Betrayer to Martyr

The Citizen today ran a story about a Coptic papyrus manuscript that has been tested and dated and authenticated as being 1,700 years old. The National Geographic Society unveiled the find on Thursday. It seems that it's the lost Gospel of Judas, or the Gospel According to Judas.

In short: Jesus told Judas to betray him, thus making Judas not Christ the greatest martyr of all time, in my mind. The reason was to liberate Christ from the flesh and exemplify his spiritual transformation. The article goes on to describe the contents of the manuscript as detailing that Judas was in fact Christ's closest disciple, and that "you will exceed all of them. For you will sacrifice the man that clothes me." (the body that encases the spirit - great line!)

Very interesting. I don't have a link to it, but I'm sure you can find it all over. No doubt it's an AP story.

Weirdest keyboards

I want the laser virtual keyboard.

The Aesthetic of Simplicity

... is white, with an Apple logo. Now, I'm not normally one to hop on bandwagons (especially not 'hipster' ones), but goddamn. Everything is so easy. I go to a blog, say, and just hit RSS icon at the end of the url and bam... a RSS feed version of the page pops overtop the main HTML page. Then bookmark it, and tada. Hit it again, and you're back to the HTML.

Searching... easy as freakin' toast with Spotlight. Everything on the machine is indexed, and iconicized for visual differentiation of search results. So if I do a search on Tom, if I have emails, images, document matches, etc... they'll all be sorted and categorized by where the results fall under (images, applications, documents, contacts) so it's really easy.

I've downloaded Adium and actually remembered my ICQ and YIM info. Guess I'll have to get MSN working so I can integrate that also. (Adium - thanks Suzi! - is like Trilium... it's one program for all IM programs)

Anyhoo... More work to do, I guess. Later,

iDone it

Pre-paid for my 14" iBook G4 today. $2,399 including: AirPort Express (wireless router) and a Logitech mouse. I'll have it on Tuesday. WOOHOOO!

Yeah, yeah... I didn't get the fancy one, the MacBook Pro. It came out to $2,762 by itself, after taxes; no wireless router or mouse. No thanks.

Have passport, will travel

Just got my passport. Yay! But... I forgot to ask and pay extra for the 48 page one instead of the standard 24 page. Bleh. Oh well.

Also swung by Ottawa's Mac store and I'm a convert. Depending on whether or not I can negotiate birthday "back-pay" out of my parents, I'll go for the MacBook Pro, a sweet little piece of machinery.

That's it for now.

Speaking for the dead

I just finished watching a documentary of sorts about Tolkien, though to be honest it was so lacking in content that it went through the entire bloody Lord of the Rings plotline with really crappy stock footage to accompany it.

The thing that got me was how able and willing random dickheads were to speak the mind of someone who is dead. "Tolkien believed..." said Stupid Bint, Library Critic. "What Tolkien was trying to accomplish was..." said Some Ass, Military Academy. "It wasn't about that at all. It was about..." said Numb Nuts, Tolkien Historian.

Who the hell are they to know and communicate the inner thoughts of a dead man, especially one who in his life was extremely private? I'm sorry, but there were interview clips with JRR Tolkien himself, and I honestly could not understand 1/10th of what that guy was saying. His accent and speech mannerisms were atrocious, especially for a philologist! I'm surprised even he could communicate his own thoughts in a way that others could understand. Two of his children were shown -- sparingly -- and they could be understood no problem. (I thought it interesting that Christopher Tolkien was not the son interviewed, considering his up-take of his father's literary aftermath.)

It just bugs the hell out of me that people possess such arrogance that they attempt to say, without doubt or concern, that someone that they never knew in the entirety of their obsessive lives believed X, Y and Z. Am I the only one who finds that simply stupid? I'd rather see 10 minutes of interviews with Tolkien himself (via a translator, thank you) than 2 hours of 'expert testimony'. One guy (who was actually quite well-spoken) even had the gall to say that Tolkien wrote women 'out of the gender box'. My ass he did. Eowyn was the only woman that was a woman of action; all the rest just looked pretty behind the scenes. Same in the Silmarillion... only Luthien was 'active'. The rest were just sort of there on a pedistal, Astrophil and Stella style.

Anyhoo... it just occurred to me how stupid it is to make such glaring suppositions about someone you've never met. Seeing 3 people in a row say 3 very definitive statements about someone they'd never spoken with just sort of blew my mind. I hope I'm never famous or inquired-about after I die so I don't have a bunch of assholes stepping forward to tell the world what they know I really thought.

Gah. Angry.

When the body breaks...

... and the mind follows suit.

As of Saturday, 2am, I became more sick than I've ever been. Fever without burning temperature, unable to eat, unable to hydrate, unable to sleep, chest congestion like bronchitis, migraines, body wracked by stiffness and pain, and plenty of hallucinations. By Monday, I thought I was dying. I lost about 2 or 3 lbs. Doctor said it was just a flu strain. I've been feeling better since Tuesday, but holy shit. I drank half a freakin' gallon of Gaterade, and it barely put a dent in my thirst or dryness in my mouth. 7 litres of water on Saturday and it's like my body just ignored the attempt to re-hydrate.

More than a bit frightening.

Anyhoo... so suffice it to say, it was a shitty weekend and has been a trying week so far. I feel bad missing work, but going in just hasn't been an option. I feel awful even sitting up as straight as I am to write this (in fact this was written in chunks, over the last day or two). Hopefully I will be into work tomorrow, but I don't know.

"To a passport office, go!"

(Hamlet, Act III, Scene 4)

So off I go. Hopefully I won't have to fake having eubola to get through the line-ups, but we'll see. Just realized how stupid I am for attempting this in March with March break 2 weeks away. Brilliant! I am a planning GOD!

Jumped into email real quick this morning out of habit, and there was an email from Adrian and Fiona. They've got Japan pictures up from Kyoto! That stiffened my resolve, let me tell you. So I'm off. Will write more when I'm back. Although I'm working from home today, there will be precious little working. I plan on working through my specialization and fine-tuning my international resume to send to Ray, the alumni coordinator at TESOL, who will review and offer some advice. Then I begin looking, and will again employ Ray to spread his ESL tendrils into Nara prefecture to dig up opportunities in Nara.

Off I go!

Oh, and I got all the mp3 Japanese lessons from a guy at work. Sweet. Tried to burn them to a music cd so I could employ good ol' hypnopaedia to become a Japanese linguist. Yes... that's the ticket.

I'll be back with a fun (okay, boring) anecdote from the passport office. If I'm not back in 3 hours, send JTF 2 in for me.

-----
Edit: Okay, an hour and a bit later... I'm back. That was boring. They didn't even cavity search. Pffft. Will have my passport back by the 27th.

"I'm like a shark. I've just got to... keep making analogies."

Not sure if any of you avid gamers read "Penny Arcade", but I would highly endorse it if you are a gamer (video gamer, that is). Hell, I endorse it if you aren't and simply like off-the-wall, well-drawn satire/sarcasm.

Reasons 1) The comics are really funny and bang-on if you follow games and the gaming industry, and 2) these two guys are a great example of how enlightened geeks can be heard by industry behemoths such as SoE, Blizzard, etc. I thought their blog today was quite funny -- apparently someone at SoE saw their comic and fired a humour-filled shot across Penny Arcade's bow by delivering 1,200 Krispy Kreme donuts to them. Nice.

In other more significant news, a good friend of mine (whom I'll call "J." but whom some may recognize by the writing anyway) engaged me in an email dialogue yesterday re: concerns of heading overseas to teach. I like to think of the conversation as one from Confucius to Confusion. (okay, witty I am not.)

...So, friend, now I am doing this for you. Though we will all miss you, I know that you aren't happy and have enormous capacities that are being wasted here and that you need to take a step. A step that will make your life much richer, with a little risk. A risk that doesn't have to be forever, but that will make your life better forever. And maybe Japan isn't the place, but why not? Its not the place as much as the experience of having lived it and the changes it brings to you.

Furthermore, re: my concern of having a new life overseas subsume this one:

An observation: I have wrestled forever with the idea of internal and external consistency and am coming to the realization that friends are a reflection of the facets of ourselves and therefore are consistent only with our own inconsistencies or contradictions and that diversity is not necessarily a contradiction. While we may try to live an internally consistent life, as humans, we don't get to achieve it. We can however, learn to enjoy our internal diversity. So we can grow and change and add new facets and therefore new relationships without worrying about cancelling out the old ones. At least that is as far as I have divined.

Brilliant, and thank you, J.! You don't know how much it meant to me to get those emails from you and S. yesterday.

With that, I'll say this: I am going to take the step as planned, risks and effects be damned. There is a lot about it that causes me to worry, but who gives a fuck? Worrying is only useful if it enables one to tackle the cause of said worry. If one experiences simply a Heideggerian "worry worry worry worry WORRY" fit, what's the point in having that emotional state?

So yeah. Onwards and upwards (and westwards, I guess).

How Canadians feel about the upcoming election...

It's funny because it's true:

Martin, Harper, and Layton are flying on the Executive Airbus to a gathering in British Columbia when Martin turns to Harper and says, chuckling, "You know, I could throw a $1000 bill out the window right now and make someone very happy." Harper shrugs and replies, "Well, I could throw ten $100 bills out the window and make ten people happy."

Not to be outdone, Layton says, "Well I could throw a hundred $10 bills out the window and make a hundred people happy."

The pilot rolls his eyes and says to his co-pilot, "Such arrogant jerks back there. Heck, I could throw all three of them out the window and make 32 million people happy."

Stupidity by any other name...

I read this quote and laughed:

"This president has a real pattern of defying conventional wisdom," says Mark McKinnon, media adviser for Bush's presidential campaigns.

If by 'defying conventional wisdom' he actually means 'defying wisdom', then yes... yes, he does. Article was in regards to Bush's 6th year in office; typically the 6th year is when shit goes down, and not for the better.

May this year be no different for Bush, but may we all be spared from the consequences of his over-awing stupidity.

300

This is interesting: In Montreal, Phantom of the Opera star Gerard Butler will wrap up work on 300, a film based on Frank Miller’s novel about the 480 BC Battle of Thermopylae. Butler plays the King of Sparta who led his army against the Persians.

I expect it to be atrocious, but hey... that's not pessimism, that's simply observing precedent. Too bad the movie wasn't based on Steven Pressfield's "Gates of Fire" instead. It might stand a chance.

Happy New Year... I really do not want to go back to work. Recharged my ass. The only thing that's recharged is my desire to get out of where I work.

Really shoulda...

...taken next week off. I'm already dying.

Tomorrow I have 8 hours of class. Then Sunday I have 9 hours... then Monday comes work. Ugh.

Urge to kill rising. (but at least knowledge is increasing)

That is all for now. Time to get 8 hours sleep (OMG! 8 HOURS!! WOOOOO!!!) and then class time.

Talk to you all when I'm less ummm... something something. Can't think anymore. At least I learned how to say "What is it/this?" in Japanese: Kore wa nan desu ka? (the 'u' in 'desu' is silent) "Kore wa nan desu ka?" *points at a book* "Kore wa nan han desu, sensei." "Kore wa nan desu ka?" *points at keys* "Kore wa nan kagi desu, sensei."

I'll get there. Oh, and 'ichi' is 'one', and 'ni' is 'two'. So long as I can say "one beer please", I'll be just fine.

Jumping ahead of myself?

I'm already looking into leisure activities in Japan, and obviously martial arts are high on the list. So far, I very badly want to do both iaido (sword art) and kyudo (meditative archery). Should I be in Nara City, I know there is a kyudo 'centre' or training area (there is a whole area devoted to sports and martial arts, like a university campus). Couldn't find any dojos for iaido, but likely they will be associated with kendo.

Obviously, taking Japanese is my priority, and I'd love to learn calligraphy and take a cooking class. From what I've learned about culture shock from alumni experience, keeping busy is absolutely vital. The fascination stage of culture shock can quickly wear off or when it does, the frustration phase is quick on its heels. The key to defeating frustration (which includes home-sickness, depression and actual frustration at the cultural differences) is two-fold: friendship and activity. I thought the friendship part of that was very interesting. The instructors stressed that teachers shouldn't be overly dependent on other teachers, as most teachers are 'here today, gone tomorrow'. The emphasis was on having native friends.

The reason I thought friendship was interesting is because I've traditionally internalized frustration and adversity, as opposed to airing it and discussing it. Friendship is thus the 2nd phase of culture shock (I guess designed to pre-empt frustration, the 3rd), with fulfillment being the fourth. (Fulfillment is perhaps the wrong word, as it's more like acceptance and being in a stable comfort zone.)

Can't stop thinking about this whole experience. I just feel that the more I dwell on it, the more real it is/will be. The only things that make me nervous are the practical details like what do I do about my cat, my apartment and my furniture. Most of that is covered, but it's still kinda up in the air since no steps have been taken. Anyhoo...

Guess I should work. :D

First class

Wow. It was a great first class, and looks like it will be a great series of classes overall. However, my days will be very long and busy. I won't even be able to go home from work tomorrow or Friday, considering the time to took me to finangle a bus from Bank St to the Rideau Centre today.

The instructors are great: motivational, informative, direct and dynamic. The workbook is a nice mixture of set-up, tutorial, anecdotes and perspectival articles/lists on ESL. Some great parts about the complexity of English, culture shock, reverse culture shock, group dynamics, cultural relevance as applied to teaching, etc. Already have "homework"; very minor thing.

I was nervous at first, but now I'm focused and excited. Very much looking forward to seeing this through and getting as much info as I can.

Optimum location

Just looking over locales in Japan (not that I'd ever do so at work! -- pfft), Osaka is a bit too big. 8.8 million people. However... Nara, just 45 minutes by train from Osaka (and 40 minutes from Kyoto and Kobe) seems damn perfect at 365,000 people. Avg temp of 4 C in the winter months, and 24 C in the summer months. Smaller population, less of a tourist location, very historic compared to Osaka which is very "mercantile" and urbane. The prefecture has tonnes of amazing temples, including the very first 3-storey pagoda.

There's also a huge deer park there, sacred because it was believed that the founder of the city/area arrived on the back of a white deer. Deer are considered the messengers of the gods there. Long story short... it's freakin' beautiful, and less of a concrete jungle.

Did you know that the average movement speed for Osakans is 1.6 km/h, whereas it is only 1.56 km/h in Tokyo, making it the most busy city in Japan? Oh the things you can find out with wikipedia...

Music Genome Project

Now is this damn cool.

Pandora's Box

Enter in a band or song, and it will match the tendencies of that music to similar bands/songs and create a playlist or 'station' for you. I'm gunna be abusing this at home for sure. Great way to find new bands and music.

Hurry up and wait

Things seem in fast-forward now as the end of '05 draws nigh. I've just been coasting for a good year or so, and now plans are accelerating and solidifying. It's invigorating, but also a bit frightening. I'm not a fan of drastic change. Ah, who am I kidding... I get unnerved when I change the sheets on my bed. :)

That said... This Weds I begin the first steps of my teaching odyssey; it's set in stone more or less. It will be an intense week, with like 40 hours of class time from Weds through Sunday as I hammer out phase one of the TESOL course: methodology and basic instruction. I'll move immediately to work on the online portions (grammar and instruction specialization) so that I'm in a good position to try a practicum in January. The plan is still to get outta Dodge by mid-February.

Passport stuff is in the works, and I'm going to go buy some Japanese language books: a phrasebook and possibly a cd set for learning the fundamentals of the language. Can't be too prepared, I figure. Strangely, the thing I'm most worried about is food and shopping for food. Guess I'll worry about that when I get there.

I think I'll know that all of this is real when I'm going through some of the job opps and begin the negotiations. That's when all of this will really hit home.

When Xmas Lights Go Broadway...

Wow. This is one of the most impressive things I've ever seen. Just. . . wow.

Off to the races!

I just signed up for TESOL Certification (80-100 hours of course-work and practicum). November 30th is the first class, going until the Sunday (40 hours). Then 15 hours of online course-work in grammar, then 25 hours of specialized teaching training, then 20 hours practicum (optional).

It's on now. By late December/early January, I'll have my certification, and soonafter I'll be looking for teaching opportunities in Japan (which, apparently, are numerous... 40% of ESL opportunities are in Asia).

So yeah... baby steps. Time to get my passport sorted out.

Another slip...

Wow, slipped again! Good news is I plan on writing here a bit more.

Most recent news is I'm heavily and seriously investigating second-language teaching overseas, specifically Japan. Why Japan? Two reasons: 1) I love the culture, and 2) according to most 'alumni' who have written about their experiences in teaching english around the world, Japan teaching pays highest and the programs are strongly endorsed by various Japanese ministries, such as Ministry of Foreign Affairs and Communication. So not only would I have support on the Canadian side by the agency itself, but in-country from the government.

I just need to get the hell out of Dodge. I'm rotting here, both in my job and in my mind-set. I've allowed it to happen, but if I continue down this path I'll be surprised if I live to see 40. I need a goal, an aim; something to shoot for, something new to experience. I - need - to - get - out!

In short... time for change.

So with that in mind, I'm attending a free informational seminar this evening in the Market. It's hosted by United TESOL International, a well-known ESL (English as a Second Language) organization. I'll see what they have to say.

Woops

Looks like I kinda let this slip. (quel surprise)

Not a tonne happening, and nothing on the ruminations side. Just making sure this thing still works. I'll beat on my chest later.

KEEEE-YAAAAA! *flies out a window*

New gaming video

It's done. Two different days/sessions in the level 35-39 battleground. Lots of fun, and I think this video came out a bit better than the other one. It has a few more bells and whistles anyway, the fights tend to be better at higher levels.

YouSendIt.com site

or

Savefile.com site

The first link might get tapped out, but may be faster. I've heard someone say that it seemed like a 12-minute download with high-speed internet. (it's 46 megs)

So tired...

Got 3 hours sleep last night. Strangely, I'm not exhausted, just mildly weary. I meant to go to sleep at ten after eleven, but got snared by the video editing demon. Was up til 2:25am trying to work out this annoying thinger that seems to exist in most Windows applications: if you scroll beyond the point where there is content (say in Excel, or in this case, Movie Maker) the program thinks those are the new parameters, and doesn't auto-adjust back to the last piece of datum (as per Outlook, when you delete a reply, it doesn't leave 3 scroll-screens of white). The long and short of it is a 3 minute video thought it was 6:25 minutes.

On the positive side, I'm getting a lot better at this video editing. Starting to mess around with various kinds and styles of overlays and transitions and fades. Worked a lot with trimming clip segments to match song beats, messed with white fade-in's with video transition, and different styles of title overlay (scoreboard, exploding, mirror, etc). So much fun.

I'm actually considering trying to find a course on video editing, maybe something even quasi-academic. The whole thing interests me to no end, as last night's marathon of stupidity might attest to.

That's it for now. I'll soon have a quick 1-min or so "teaser" for my next video from DAoC.

Funny picture of the day

Here it is

I laughed out loud when I saw this.

("WTF" means "what the fuck", by the way)

This one should work

Using a new post to hit RSS. Hopefully this one works!

Aedhas, 24 Shadowblade

Finished video

Okay, fully done video numero uno (Thid vid). The link in the blog post below won't work any longer.

(EDIT: took the link out. The vid was bugged. I need to re-export and upload it... gahh!)

6m 25s and 28 megs, but not bad for a second first attempt. Had a tonne of fun both playing and editing, so it's all good.

All your phat lewtz r belong 2 us!

It's very interesting how more and more tales from the online gaming world are hitting the mainstream media. Everyone seems to be recognizing the prevalence of MMOs and online games in general, and weighing in on the subject. Most opinions and articles focus on violence depicted (article in the Ottawa Citizen today on how violent games are a good thing for kids), property rights with regards to virtual objects, and social and professional pay-offs that are apparent in players of interaction/leadership-based games such as MMOs.

Wish I could find the article about how MMO gamers are more likely to have highly-regarded business skills such as working through problems, taking initiative, showing better leadership qualities, etc. It was an interesting read. Then there is the somewhat infamous news about a Chinese man killing his friend because said friend sold his buddy's sword to someone in the game (EverQuest, I think).

That one was interesting in that it begged the question: can virtually owned objects be considered legitimate and legally-protected property? It sounds like a stupid question; one that most would scoff at and say "it's a bunch of frickin' pixels!". However... consider the situation thusly: you pay $25 for the retail game itself, but additionally pay $15 a month subscription. All activities including character, setup, inventory and status are maintained on a back-end server by the producer of the game. Very little of the playing experience happens on a local PC. If you physically rent a storage unit for $25 a month, and someone breaks in and steals your DVD player... that's theft. Considering that online items such as weapons, armour, etc are sold for large quantities of money on eBay and elsewheres, why is an item in a game not property? One acquires it through a transaction or a trade that is considered of value (else why do it in the first place?) or by actually going and getting the item (a kind of Lockean spin on property)... does that not meet the standard definitions of article possession?

Anyhoo, I'm constantly intrigued by anything and everything relating to online games. As stated previously, I honestly believe that as the military/government built and pioneered the Internet, MMO gamers and game companies are pioneering the next phase of virtual interaction.

Video editing

Okay, I'm addicted to video editing. I made my first DAoC video, albeit very short (9.05 megs), after downloading and registering FRAPS, a screen capture program that is, quite simply, a one-click wonder. Then I used Windows Movie Maker (pretty straightforward, if lacking in a few bells and whistles) to glue the thing together. I don't think it's too bad for 30 mins of work, and for a first try to boot.

Ector Midgard Thidranki Fun!

So feel free to check it out, or not. (ie, all normal viewing rules apply)

(EDIT: 08/24/05 -- this link no longer works. See the post above from 08/23/05 for working link)

Taiji

I've been feeling unsettled latetly, and just generally out of it. I think the main issue is one of inactivity.

So in the spirit of filling that void, I've looked into Tai Chi. I've sent an email to the senior instructor of the Tai Chi Studio, a downtown school about 10 minutes from where I live that teaches the full spectrum of tai chi (3 different styles, and long-form, solo form, staff forms and sword forms).

I got a long reply back today, a very positive one, and I am going to go watch a class tomorrow evening, and the two classes on Saturday. This will give me an idea of all 3 styles (Yang, Sun and Baguazhang) and how they differ and what they emphasize.

I'm looking forward to it. The instructor seems very down-to-earth, and quite competent (as can be seen from his various writings on the subject of martial arts, dedication, what to look for, etc).

So we'll see how tomorrow goes!

Alexander the Catastrophy

I hate Oliver Stone.

The movie "Alexander" is worth less than a sugar-coated fart, and if you even watch the intro credits, you'll immediately come away thinking "Oh my god... I've just wasted 4 minutes of my life!". First off, it was horribly cast. Secondly, it went through the entire Persian conquest within 15 minutes after the first battle (which was actually Alexander's 4th, chronologically).

They ignored the battle wherein he was blooded against the Greeks at Thebes, charged by his father to break the Sacred Band, the Thebian elite heavy infantry unit that spelled the end for Spartan power in Greece. They ignored his father's assassination, and the Greek rebellion. They bloody ignored the Battle of the Granicus and Issus!!! They started, more or less, at Gaugamela (which I think was 4 years into his Persian campaign) where Alexander routs Darius from the field. They ignored his trek into Egypt. They ignored pretty much his entire campaign in Asia Minor, Persia, etc. Out of 1,000 elements they attempted to implicate, they only got a handful even close to correct.

I hardly ever watch half a movie. Even if it sucks, I might turn my attentions to my computer, or my cat or whatever, but the movie will keep going in the background. I shut off "Alexander" after about 45 minutes.

The pros:

• They got his horse's name correct, and the story behind Bucephalus.
• Through high-shot camera sequences, they showed how Alexander used to advance on the oblique, a novel technique to phalanx warfare whereby an opposing force does not advance in a straight line, but leads with one edge on the diagonal, typically leading with a reinforced, strong right (keeping those on the left, the shield-side, protected). This was a strategy his father innovated and Alexander perfected.
• ... and they showed (for 1.8 seconds) the Agrianians, who were the coolest detachment in Alexander's army. They were a group of ~700 mountain-clan javelineers who would run with the cavalry units, both Companion cavalry and Thessalians, and hurl with devastating effect heirloom javelins at the enemy. They were specifically employed to destroy enemies on heights such as steep slopes and mountainous terrain.

Cons:

You mean aside from the very existence of this shite movie?

• Colin Farrell. He - is - not - European. He doesn't look European, he doesn't sound European, and he sure as hell does not look to be in his 20s or even early 30s. Colin Farrell is a worse actor than Keanu Reeves. At least directors have the wisdom to cast Reeves in parts that suit him.
• Why the hell was Jared Leto in this movie? He looked like a 12-year-old girl, not a boyhood companion and soldier of Alexander's.
• Alexander III was not a fucking German. It is almost certain that he did not have blonde hair! He sure as hell didn't have bleached blonde hair. Jesus H. God-Dancing Christ. Have you seen many Greeks with blonde hair? The little details that were utterly screwed-up in this movie just completely piss me off.
• In the movie, the Companion cavalry had about as much coordination as a spider-monkey rotting in a gutter, when in actual fact they were the first cavalry ever that was used to break enemy infantry lines (and not in the way illustrated in the movie). In the movie, it looked like he had all of 50 cavalrymen (charging across their own fucking lines, obscuring the view of their infantry and the advance), when in fact his full cavalry complement would have been closer to 5,000 to 10,000 (including Companions, Thessalians, and mercenary Greek horse as well as Persian units in the latter years of the campaign). This is not a hard thing to render with today's CG technology.
• His troops, although displaying sarrissas (14-foot infantry lances of Alexander's invention), were disorganized, mostly-unarmoured rabble gathered in clumps not even closely resembling a military phalanx. There was no shield overlapping so they all should have died under the first volley of Persian arrow since the Persians had about 75,000 archers. Considering a well-trained (or at least not-bloody-stupid) archer can draw, nock and fire an arrow in 5 seconds, that's a shit-load of bronze-tipped wood flying through the air at high velocity over the course of a minute, the minimum it would take to close ranks between two opposing forces. Especially when one is side-stepping and moving in the oblique.
• The fighting. Dear god, it sucked. It looked like two hordes just whelming into each other, as opposed to solid bricks moving as one. There was so much space between each man in the units that you could have driven a wagon through. They would have broken after the initial impact. Phalanx fighting was dependent on grinding the man in front of you forward, compacting your shield into position to defend your companion, and forcing forward. It ought to look a lot like a reverse tug-of-war.
  
• Alexander's mother was not some pouty-faced witch-woman. She was eccentric, and into exotic cults, and yeah, every now and then it was rumoured she had snakes around. But she wasn't a goddamn Angelina Jolie weirdo wench.
• Alexander's father was a heavy-handed but cunning man and war-leader who revolutionized Classical warfare, not a stumbling-drunk brutish asshole as Val Kilmer played him as. We're talking about a man who unified dozens upon dozens of mountain clans that had been in-fighting and raiding each other for centuries. A one-eyed dipshit could hardly get them to coordinate, let alone fight and subjugate the entireity of the Greek mainland.
• Alexander, himself, didn't possess exceptional ambition, and he wasn't arrogant as portrayed. His daemon (a god's manifestation in the soul of Man) drove him forward, set his ambitions. It controlled him, more or less; executed its desires through him. Small thing, and somewhat hard to convey, but very essential to understanding the pious and humble nature of the greatest conquerer in the world.
• What the hell was with his helmet?? ARGH!! So goddamn stupid. What dicksmack would ride around in next to no armour, but wear a helm with not just one plume, but 2 side plumes? Why not just ride over to the enemy and tell them to cut you down.
• The army. Where was the damn army? That wasn't 43,000 soldiers. On top of any combat army itself, there are 3 times as many civilians/military support personnel: farriers, smiths, cooks, servants, squires, attendants, scribes, historians, priests, teamsters. Where was the baggage train? He had no sea support until he won at Gaugamela or Issus (can't remember, but I think it was Issus) so how the hell did he feed 43,000 men 6,000 miles from his homeland in the middle of relatively inhospitable terrain?
• On the other side of the fight... what the hell was up with Darius'? His forces all looked like they'd been dragged out of some ditch on the way from Persepolis to Gaugamela. The Persian forces were reputed to look like dandies: blooming pantaloons of vibrant colours, scale-mail vests, wicker shields, etc. In short, they looked like courtiers on their way to a ball. These guys looked like something out of Jesus Christ Super-Star. Also, Darius' army was around 300,000. So picture a fifth the population of Toronto jammed onto a battlefield that is only 2 square miles. Also, Darius had his entire royal family with him, and pavilions, etc. Those were nowhere to be seen. Just the dork on a chariot (accurate) who made stupid decisions with his forces. Also, he wasn't shown near enough respect as one would usually accord a god (Persian emperors were gods incarnate to their nation).
  
• Distance. In the span of 30 seconds, Alexander is teleported 5,000 miles from Iran to Afghanistan. S-t-u-p-i-d.
• ... and more.
  

In short (ha!), this movie was an atrocity, and deserved even less than the 17% rating on RottenTomatoes. The absolute worst thing about this movie? Now that one has been made, it would be very difficult to do a decent movie on the subject for some time. They have not only spit upon a legacy, and a turning point in both Western and Eastern history, but made it highly unlikely that it can be shown on the big-screen in a way that does it justice.

Don't get me started on Troy...

Immortal Power Brought Low by Taser

Check this guy out.

This makes top article of the day for sure. What a n00b. Chainmail vs Taser? Should have gone with Blue Dragonhide for the electricity resistance of 25. And if he was against numerous opponents, he ought to have cast Haste on himself for an extra partial action per round. Pffft. "Thousand years of power" my arse.

>;)

iYuppy?

(Warning: might be preaching to the choir here, but let me have my fun and bear in mind that not everyone is Mr. Tech Bleeding Edge.)

Short of having an Austin Mini, a suburban carboncopy homestead/townhouse, and a can-do ultra-professional girlfriend, I think I may have taken the final step to yuppy-dom... last night I bought an iPod (and the latest NIN album - yay!).

Let me just say this: iPods (and Apple products in general) understand one thing very well: user experience/user interface is as important as product quality. Sometimes more important since usability/interface is something that customers see upfront; it's most top-of-mind. The iPod app, iTunes, is so stupid-easy even I can use it with only infrequent use of the Help option. (The tutorial on the Apple.com site is simply fantastic, by the way -- walk-through videos!).

I got one of the iPod Mini's (4 gig version, or 1,000 songs) which is enough for me. (they also sell 20, 40 and 60 gig iPods... you know, for those of you in the world who have the equivalent to the Library of Congress in music... yeah, all 6 of you) The ability to create customized, on-the-go playlists make having anything larger than a 6 gig capacity superfluous, in my opinion.

I'm not normally one for gushing over freakin' electronics, but... the iPod itself is very intuitive and laid out in a way that only Apple could have built. There is a LCD display, a centre Select button surrounded by a wheel, and on the scroll wheel at the 4 points of the vertical/lateral 'compass': a Play/Pause, Menu, Forward and Backward on the scroll wheel. Nothing else. It's simply as hell. Choose Music hit Select, use the scroll wheel to navigate the menus, hit Select. To go back, hit Menu. That - is - it.

More impressive, however, is the application that is the iPod's brain: iTunes. You start it up, it instantly recognizes which iPod is connected and uses those settings. It scans your computer for any .mp3 and .wmf or whatever and loads them all into a Library folder. From there, you can create and make custom folders, and set the iPod to update from any and/or all of those directories. Every time you plug the iPod in and start iTunes, it auto-updates so that if you've converted 8 cds that week but haven't manually moved them to your iPod, it does it for you. Me no think = me happy good.

The neatest feature is its auto-recognize CD thinger. Put in a music CD, and iTunes will load up and display all the tracks with all information. Then click or (Ctrl+A to get all of them) and right-click and Convert to AAA and bam... you've just made a CD iPod'able in about 45 seconds. AND it will retain track #, title, artist, album name, and genre (without displaying it). Click and drag all those songs into a custom folder, Update iPod, and you're ready to go. Rinse, repeat. Took me 2.5 mins to get about 28 songs from 3 CDs (2 NIN albums) into my custom folder and on my iPod for this morning. I've got 449 songs on there, with plenty of room left. I was file-hoppin' like mad this morning, going from the new NIN to Breaking Benjamin, to Toasters (coming to the nation's capitol on 16 Sept!!), to Sublime to Jethro Tull to Diana Krall. Frickin' sweet.

Honk if you also love having new toys.

Safeharbor Statement: I do not own nor manage client accounts containing Apple stocks or mutual funds, and was in no way paid or compensated for this flagrant gushing.

Something Wicked This Way Slowly Saunters

My reading as of late has been very sporadic, or I've been re-reading novels, mostly fantasy-adventure. This is, and has been for 8 months, due to one thing: I have not finished the Dark Tower series.

I just found out (or rather, was reminded) that the trade paperback edition of the final novel in the series, The Dark Tower, is not available until November. To be quite blunt, that sucks. I know why they've done it, of course. The typical wait time between hardcover and paperback (or trade) is roughly 6-9 months, depending on the popularity of or hype surrounding the book in question. It can be as long as 12 months, but very very rarely.

The Dark Tower will be have been a 12-month wait by the time it hits trade paperback. Thus far, I have been lucky in that no one has ruined it for me, or even spoken of it. The entire series has become a very private thing for most of Stephen King's CRs, as he calls them ("constant reader"s, as in "Have faith, my constant reader"). People simply don't talk much about it because it's one of the rare sets of books that people enjoy internalizing. No one wants to know what another person thinks of Roland, or Eddie or even Oi ("'Ake!"). The storyline in the Gunslinger (book one) is more open to discussion, but as soon as the second and third and fourth books emerged, it became "Have you read Wizard & Glass?" "Nope, not yet." ... silence. Not "Oh, it's really good" or "It's too damn long", just acceptance of the response and a tacit understanding that nothing more can be said without verging upon the blasphemous.

Anyway, all my reading energies are being conserved for this final volume in what has become, essentially, a modern-day saga; the closest this age may come to calling a literary work an epic (minus the "in media res", catalogue of warriors, and other epic conventions) since Milton.

In other news, it looks like Hollywood has recognized the substantial impact of video games on their demographic, and are moving into movie-ized versions of a few. There has already been the two Tomb Raider ones (bleh), and coming up are Doom (with the Rock) as well as Hitman: Codename 47 (with Vin Diesel). Hard to say how either of those will go, as there was never much of a story to either one, and you can hardly fill 1.5 hours with random assassination missions (in the case of Hitman) or opening doors and chainsawing zombies with rocket-launchers for arms (in the case of Doom). Though if the head rocket-launcher arms guy were to be played by Christopher Lee or Gary Oldman... hmmm... I can picture it now. "I have crossed oceans of time... 2 PWN U CUZ 1 4M L337!!11one!1!"

That is all for now. Bring on the weekend and beer and BBQ and Family Guy!

China to ban under-18s from PK-content games

Very interesting article. China has banned all people under the age of 18 from from any online games that contain "PK" (player killing; ie, going toe-to-toe with other players in an attempt to defeat them).

It's effective immediately, or I assume as immediate as gaming vendors can implement the age validation mechanism spoken of.

I would love to watch the riotous backlash in South Korea if the government were to try to do the same thing. The government would be overthrown by 800,000 12-17 year olds, I have no doubt. (and I'm serious)

The truth is, online gaming is an enormous market. In the game I play, Dark Age of Camelot, the total player base is in the hundreds of thousands. During the low periods of any given day, there are approximately 3,500 people online. During the peak periods, it can be as high as 30,000 or 40,000. That only accounts for one game out of about half a dozen games out there that are considered mainstream MMOs (Massively Multiplayer Online games) such as EverQuest and EverQuest II, World of Warcraft, City of Heroes, Lineage II, Final Fantasy XI Online, etc. I can only assume that as many as 150,000-250,000 people are online playing games at any given time.

Neal Stephenson's Metaverse, here we come! I estimate only 15-25 years before the Internet we know becomes far more immersive, involving online "avatars" (digital representations of our "meat" selves) roaming "avenues" that are cables and fibre-optic lines, chatting in "cafés" that are chat rooms and forums, and browsing in "stores" that are data nexi such as retail banking centres, personal websites, e-tailers, government e-services, etc. Internet II is already under development, so I'm thinking it will not be until the third rev of the Internet that we will see that kind of "information as metaphor" transformation.

Let's see if I'm right.

Sugar coating the difference between T & E

Something I was thinking of the other day (warning: anecdote incoming) when a friend of mine's son (8 years old) handed the PC game, Star Wars: Jedi Knight Academy, back to me, slightly chagrined, saying that he shouldn't play it due to the Teen rating and his father's computer's vid card was not a gaming card.

My first thoughts were along the lines of relief, having realized after I'd lent it to him that it was unlikely he could play it, game-controls-wise, as it's fairly intricate. The last thing that had crossed my mind was the game rating issue. Here's my beef with game ratings and why it never occurred to me:

Game ratings are more or less useless, like a lot of non-R rated movie ratings. Take a game like Super Mario Bros from Nintendo. It has an E rating (E = Everyone; aka rated G). So it is of a fantastic nature, with 'fantasy or mild violence'. Then take Jedi Knight Academy, rated T (T = Teen; aka PG 13), which 'may contain violence, suggestive themes, crude humor, minimal blood and/or infrequent use of strong language'. So the only thing here that qualifies is 'may contain violence'.

Super Mario Bros: you've got a plumber in a crazy world of castles, evil mushrooms, flying turtles, 'magic' mushrooms that make you grow, and an exhorbitant number of pipes (many of which sprout fire-breathing plants). In this world, our peasant hero is off to save a princess by running around, smashing the local mushroom and turtle population into the ground and eating magic mushrooms to be more powerful. So you have good guy vs bad guy(s), in a wacky fantasy world. Seems innocent, right?

Not at all. Picture this, if you will: Some guy, uninvited from another dimension, has taken it upon himself to pound the crap out of the locals, while seeking 'power ups' from mushrooms and flowers, taking money along the way. Sure, the bad guys squish in a cute, cartoony way, with silly sound effects, and when they kill the plucky pisano, he pops into the air and drops off the screen with a "woo woo wooo wooooooo....." sound. But make no mistake: Mario is out for blood with the end goal of gettin' some princess lovin's.

Jedi Knight: you, as a Jedi student, and friend begin their training under Luke Skywalker (set 10-15 years after Episode VI). Weird things start happening, and you as a new student have to undertake missions with your Jedi master overseeing your conduct. The plot unravels over the course of missions, and your friend from training goes missing, with him becoming seduced to the dark side by the nefarious behind-the-scenes bad guys. Throughout the whole thing, as a Jedi, you are singled out by renegades, smugglers, miscellaneous baddies and the Remnant, what is left of the Empire (stormtroopers mostly) and have to avoid or defeat them to carry on and complete your tasks.

There is no blood, simulated, unrealistic or otherwise, and no coarse language. (I mean, c'mon, when did you ever hear Luke say "Holy fuck! You're my father? NOOOOOO!". He was always "Well, gee-wiz, Obi-Won, that's a swell idea."). Along the way you have the option to make a pretty nasty decision (kill your friend who went to the dark side, or be merciful) but that's about it, and it's a moral decision with consequences in later missions.

Summary: both games are violent, but I would argue that Jedi Knight is less inappropriate than some E games. A Jedi has a goal, and in the game, every mission is designed to build up the plot and set the stage for the end (and you have no idea what the ending is). Mario's goal is to get T&A by kicking the snot out of 98 levels of bad guys, who, I might add, are not really bad but only enslaved versions of the good-aligned toadstool people. I mean, yes, as a Jedi you lightsaber a good many people, all of whom are out to destroy the New Republic and bring back the Empire. Mario just wants the princess. There is no political or moral drivers here... only the desire to pound goombas (isn't that racist? yet that's what they're called) and get some tail. Can someone argue that jumping on a turtle, then kicking it through and killing multiple msuhroom people only to have it rebound and be punted down a hole worse than a Jedi trying to keep his friend from the dark side and stopping the political fabric of the universe from unraveling?

It's all about sugar coating. Take the Legend of Zelda as another example, also rated E. Link, little boy do-gooder, seeks to (surprise!) free a princess. (a theme, which, I might add, is sexist) In so doing, the guy clear-cuts entire areas with his sword trying to find enough rupees (rupees??) to buy bombs so he can blow up both people and ancient, historical buildings. Hmmm... You don't find Jedi killing people for wealth to buy mini weapons of mass destruction (MWMDs). In fact, in one mission, you are trying to disarm them while keeping Boba Fett off your back (a very cool mission, I have to say) and doing other things like trying to restore a Jedi Knight's tomb to proper order because it's being defiled by dark siders. These are noble goals.

Kirby (another E game) freakin' sucks enemies up and spits their energy out at other enemies! He is, in essence, subsuming their souls for his own purposes. You don't see many Jedi eating souls. And Kirby is rewarded for it by earning points, as is Mario!

Again, though... sugar coating. E games have cute music and zany sound effects, therefore the perception is that they are fun and contain healthy content. Games rated T are simply honest with their content. End of semi-coherent rant.

Completely off-topic, there is nothing cooler than hearing a German named Wolfgang say "Cool".

"I push my fingers into my eyes..."

Okay, upon cursory glance, I thought I had a lot of books, but also figured I had the storage units (aka, bookshelves) to contain them.

.............. Sadly, I was mistaken. Very very mistaken.

About an hour and a half ago, I began unpacking my books in earnest. Foolish me, I actually thought that one bookshelf could hold all my fantasy and sci-fi, mixed together by author. Not - even - fucking - close. I very badly need a Gravbenda(tm) so I can shelve my books perpendicularly on the ceiling.

So I've used up 2 of my 4 bookshelves for fantasy and sci-fi, and that's after removing the "grey" ones: Michael Marshall Smith, historical lit, etc. that could conceivably go into those bookshelves.

The scary thing? I actually think there's more of a mess now -- after putting some books away -- than when I initiated this folly.

I'd like to post something meaningful, but truly there has been a lot of SFA happenin' in my life. I'm sure I'll hit 70 and someone will ask "What was your life like? You lived in such an amazing period of history" and I'll say "Ummm... you know... I ummm... *mumble, mumble* and stuff".

One highlight was having caught up on most of the 4th season of Family Guy thanks to Aaron having burninated me a dvd of 7 recent episodes.

Ummm... yeah. Guess that's it. Oi. Back to the ol' librarian work...

No reason not to die laughing

A few quick hits for now:

I love 'Maddox'-esque write-ups like this: Human Torch with ATV toy!

Okay, just plain funny: Classifieds

More later!

My new hero

Whoever this guy is, he is my new hero.

In praise of good fantasy

I've read a lot of fantasy novels over the years, starting in grade 6 with pulp Forgotten Realms novels and Choose-Your-Own-Adventure books (I remember having like 80 bookmarks in those types) and subsequently moving to Dragonlance and Dark Sun, etc. Then I started with Terry Brooks, Dennis L. McKiernan, J. R. R. Tolkien and multiple others.

Let's be very clear: fantasy novels definitely follow Sturgeon's Law, which is "90% of everything is crap".

(You can find this in the forward in Callahan's Cross-Time Saloon, as an anecdote by author Spyder Robinson. Basically, at a convention someone said "90% of sci-fi books are crap", to which Sturgeon replied "Actually, 90% of everything is crap".)

There are a few rare gems: Dragondoom, the Silmarillion and... the Song of Ice and Fire series by George R. R. Martin.

I've just started to re-read his first three (Game of Thrones, A Clash of Kings, Storm of Swords) because his fourth is due out in the near future, and they're amazing novels for many reasons, but outstanding fantasy novels for one reason alone: there is no nemesis or poetic justice. I.e., good guys get hurt in nasty ways, bad guys win as often as not, "good guys" aren't straight out good, no one is what they seem. The entire series is driven by politics and intrigue, and the desires of the narrative's central figures (of which there are many, both crooked and mostly-good).

The big selling point for me was a well-developed political world and a gamut of pivotal characters. He also dives into central characters' PoVs in true third-person narrative style: every chapter is told from a different character's perspective. Also, and this seems like a no-brainer but most fantasy novelists are unable to convey this... the characters grow and change over the course of the writing. Often, a perceived 'good guy' will show himself/herself to be rotten, 'bad guys' will emerge as simply pragmatic or misunderstood and misrepresented, etc.

Brilliant books all 'round, but a warning: don't read them if you can't stomach some harsh writing. The guy doesn't pull any punches, and characters you love and have followed for a book or more will suddenly find themselves perished in not-so-nice ways via treachery, sickness, character foibles, or simply through common mishap. (Don't you ever wonder why people don't break legs from a simply fall or why they only take wounds in the shoulder or thigh in most fantasy novels? Pretty stupid if you ask me.)

Anyway, enough praise for Mr. Martin. Also, I encourage anyone and everyone to read "The Virtues of War" and "Gates of Fire" by Steven Pressfield. Phenomenal historical fiction set in the Classical period (Alexander the Great and Battle of Thermopylae, respectively).

Guess I should work.

Darth Siddious, make way for Darth Hyper

What with all the brujahah about Tom Cruise lately, here's what really happened when he appeared on Oprah...

(best to right-click and Save As)

Go ahead, laugh your ass off. I did!

Alarming news

I don't mean to alarm anyone, but according to ABC News, Osama Bin Ladin is not in Afghanistan. .......

Yeah, my thoughts exactly. What actually surprises me is that anyone is still looking for him, and that they're so hopeful of catching him. I'd love to see the CIA's budget. It probably just says "Gardening Tools: $982,000,000,000".

I bet Ol' Osama is in Cuba, collecting sea-shells in between drinking cocktails, smoking cigars and checking out discoteque nights at the resorts. Hell, this is a wired world... why not just Skype with his cronies in the Middle-East, or email them from his Blackberry?

Anyhoo, just thought that article was funny. I wonder if they're still looking for Elvis, too.

On another note, tonight will be my last night of moving. I have just about everything out of my old apartment except for the majority of my kitchen accoutrements. Hopefully by this weekend, I will have everything sorted out and unpacked.

Had a pretty quiet Canada Day (as opposed to some poor folks I know), and Saturday consisted of lots of food, friends and shinanigans with a 2-11 bday party. Got to speak with John about FCM, and I'm liking the sounds of the place. I did some research online, and checked out some of their speeches and PRs. It's all quite nice and straight-forward; no marketese or fluff. They have a very solid objective, with a good structure in place to reinforce it. (That they have every Friday off for the summer is awfully damn sweet, too.)

We shall see what happens! Yesterday was the cut-off date for applying, so now the wait begins.

Guess that's about it for now.